electrikf

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2009-12-08T22:39:00.003+08:00

Don't feel like blogging here anymore!

switching over to my Tumblr for good (:

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2009-12-08T09:50:00.002+08:00

can't believe prom's over already. in a flash. i can't really rmb what went on last night but before i knew it it was like 10pm. and then 12am. and then 3.30am (wtf). and anyway i just reached home hahah X) and didn't sleep a wink ..

pics on fb later : D

2009-12-04T15:24:00.001+08:00

“you who never arrived in my arms, beloved, who were lost from the start i don’t even know what songs would please you. i have given up trying to recognise you in the surging wave of the next moment. all the immense images in me–the far-off, deeply-felt landscape, cities, towers, and bridges, and un-suspected turns in the path, you, beloved, who are all the gardens i have ever gazed at, longing. an open window in a country house, and you almost stepped out, pensive, to meet me. streets that i chanced upon, you had just walked down them and vanished. and sometimes, in a shop, the mirrors were still dizzy with your presence and, startled, gave back my too-sudden image. who knows perhaps the same bird echoed through both of us yesterday, separate, in the evening”

—	rainer maria rilke

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2009-09-30T00:40:00.003+08:00

omg.. just checked out laptop overheating tips online, and i think i'm freaking screwed. or rather, my macbook? omfg please. i'm doing all the things they say NOT to i.e. like using it on a soft surface (my couch) apparently it really heats up that way. damn. and it's kind of been a few months since. i wonder how much of my laptop's life has been killed that way.

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2009-09-25T12:16:00.001+08:00

ok i think i deserve a break.

80 more circles to shade and then it's time to face the brutal truth!

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2009-08-31T14:47:00.001+08:00

While everyone's mugging their guts out..

Yummy.

So long..

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2009-08-09T13:33:00.001+08:00

Woots check this out!

http://lab.andre-michelle.com/tonematrix/

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2009-08-07T21:59:00.001+08:00

"Sometimes fate is like a small sandstorm that keeps changing directions. You change direction but the sandstorm chases you. You turn again, but the storm adjusts. Over and over you play this out, like some ominous dance with death just before dawn. Why? Because this storm isn't something that blew in from far away, something that has nothing to do with you. This storm is you. Something inside of you. So all you can do is give in to it, step right inside the storm, closing your eyes and plugging up your ears so the sand doesn't get in, and walk through it, step by step. There's no sun there, no moon, no direction, no sense of time. Just fine white sand swirling up into the sky like pulverized bones. That's the kind of sandstorm you need to imagine.

An you really will have to make it through that violent, metaphysical, symbolic storm. No matter how metaphysical or symbolic it might be, make no mistake about it: it will cut through flesh like a thousand razor blades. People will bleed there, and you will bleed too. Hot, red blood. You'll catch that blood in your hands, your own blood and the blood of others.

And once the storm is over you won't remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won't even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm you won't be the same person who walked in. That's what this storm's all about."

— Haruki Murakami (Kafka on the Shore)

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2009-07-18T18:26:00.003+08:00

watched HP6 yesterday! : D although the climax of the whole movie wasn't that much of a climax at all compared to the previous few ... and the supposed puppy love scenes are seriously wtfomgbbqsauz ... i guess i had no choice but still watch the movie?! cos it's HP. i always knew the 6th book was kind of a filler anyway. to step up to the 7th book. : D hahah and i couldn't resist reading the 7th book again yesterday night after i came back hahah just to catch the gist la. looking forward to the final installment of the movies!

and ... Ginny should be prettier than this?

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2009-07-10T21:18:00.002+08:00

So blocks are over and all those things swept under the bed have to be settled :S

like college apps! US? UK? HK? not so keen on US anymore, UK is cheaper :D
and everyone's pressing me for potential majors. which i really have to think about.

and also SL. abcdefg...

alot of stuff to do by this weekend there's no relaxation at all after blocks la.

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2009-07-08T19:29:00.002+08:00

Today marks the end of our 3rd last major exam in hwachong.
and... after that, i promptly proceeded to lose my phone.
so damn retarded. i kept calling back but the person who picked it up never answered.
but after that my dad said he called me and a guy picked it up, maybe because he knew it wasn't me calling anymore. the most retarded part is, i dropped it in the toilet.
which means i was prolly right in guessing the biatch who picked it up sold it after she found it.

anyway, in the beginning i didn't feel that sad about it yet. until huiwei left and i started thinking about when i first got it in HK with my mum. and how we walked a few shops just to find it because not many shops sold jap phones. then after that i came home and called my mum then i totally cried buckets wts. because i know i'll never get the same one back again. and the worst thing is i just got a macbook? so i can't be so thick skin to ask for a new phone now? i don't even earn any shit and all i do is spend! abcdefffffffff!!!!!!

so anyway i temporarily deactivated my line already so don't sms / call my phone for the moment :) i don't know what the loser took my phone or even tried to sell it for, cos they'll never be able to get the charger or any accessories for it unless they do some other stupid things like get from japan. whatever. suit themselves.

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2009-07-05T22:48:00.004+08:00

+ THIS

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2009-06-21T12:13:00.000+08:00

Are we really going to keep living this way for 5 more months?

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2009-06-19T20:52:00.000+08:00

'You know what's wrong with you, Miss Whoever-you-are? You're chicken, you've got no guts. You're afraid to stick out your chin and say, "Okay, life's a fact, people do fall in love, people do belong to each other, because that's the only chance anybody's got for real happiness." You call yourself a free spirit, a "wild thing," and you're terrified somebody's gonna stick you in a cage. Well baby, you're already in that cage. You built it yourself. And it's not bounded in the west by Tulip, Texas, or in the east by Somali-land. It's wherever you go. Because no matter where you run, you just end up running into yourself.'

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2009-06-16T12:15:00.001+08:00

Because someone called CHEN YIXIAO very =.=edly went to register BOTH facebook/yi.xiao and facebook/yixiao (hell i don't understand why she needs 2 usernames). i have to be

http://www.facebook.com/yixiaoo

because i don't want to be yi.xiao1 or yi.xiao2. wth, i'm unique please. : )

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2009-06-15T18:42:00.002+08:00

I think i finally know what it meas to NOT know what items you actually possess -_- today, i discovered a grand total of 3 pairs of sandals (one silver, one gold, one orange strapped) hidden below ahem, my dad's running shoes. the state of these sandals are appalling, i think the last time i saw them were 2-3 years ago. and to think, i almost bought an IDENTICAL pair as the gold one ystd at charles and keith?! haha yep so that's officially the end of my shoe shopping for.. a very very long time. since i don't need/ like to wear heels, i think i have every kind of shoe on the planet to keep me occupied.. er except crocs which is a genre i'm not ready to venture into yet.

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2009-06-12T18:48:00.002+08:00

:OOOOO if i'd just waited a week more i could've gotten the new macbook pro which is

1) cheaper
2) has 7 hour battery life
3) has a built-in battery

and ... ok not much difference... but the battery is really important, i swear. which reminds me of the little debate me and BOOOOB had about taking out/ leaving in the battery but now i still can't decide so i end up leaving it in, but unplugging the power every time it hits 100%, and only plugging in when i have like 10% left. i don't want it to end up like the Acer one wich like a pathetic 1 hour battery span, but i don't want to let it run on AC alone also cos of low performance and blahblah other reasons. : ( how.

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2009-06-11T22:22:00.002+08:00

West coast plaza is : OOO it's cold, big, and empty as in the shops are not even leased out completely. quite a weird place. but there's starbucks and newyorknewyork and sushi tei which we pigged out at hehe.

tmr = sushi buffet with marianne = more pigging out!

i spent half an hour digging for this chem tutorial which was actually bundled behind my electrochem notes. it was such a traumatising experience blah.

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2009-06-07T13:19:00.003+08:00

Finally got rid of the Acer! say byebye to flickering screens. :)

colourful riceballs : O

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2009-06-05T19:51:00.002+08:00

i'm back on good'ol ipod MINI. it's lime green, 4GB and .. the battery still sucks but at least it HOLDS! until this one dies i don't think i'll get a new one YET. i dont like the new ipods at all with the fug screen divider thingums. and ... i duno leh i don't feel like spending more money on a new one is justified.

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2009-05-31T22:04:00.001+08:00

Moon River, wider than a mile, I'm crossing you in style some day. Oh, dream maker, you heart breaker, wherever you're going I'm going your way. Two drifters off to see the world. There's such a lot of world to see. We're after the same rainbow's end-- waiting 'round the bend, my huckleberry friend, Moon River and me.

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2009-05-30T12:54:00.001+08:00

This song is so very addictive : DD

I've been roaming around, always lookin down at all I see. Painted faces fill the places I can't reach. You know that I could use somebody. You know that I could use somebody. Someone like you, and all you know and how you speak. Countless lovers undercover of the street, you know that I could use somebody. You know that I could use somebody, someone like you. Off in the night while you live it up, I'm off to sleep, waging wars to shake the poet and the beat. I hope it's gonna make you notice. I hope it's gonna make you notice someone like me. Someone like me.

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2009-05-28T21:54:00.004+08:00

the end of my 6 years of life as a chorister! funny how i started out just going for fun with my friend. in ny. omg, i still rmb. like, stuff that ms lim said. like ... 'if you get through the audition, you must put choir as your first choice, ok?' and ... stuffs. and then like when i first came to hc i didn't want to join back but i don't know i just ended up going again. i think it was meant to be HAHAH but anyway <3 i think it's been great times.

tmr's the last day of school and i think i do need a good break.

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2009-05-20T23:09:00.001+08:00

my ipod's officially died on me. the hold button's not working anymore, so it's just switching itself on as and when as it likes and the battery goes flat like exponentially. :/ i need to backup all my songs fast (all 4500+ of them)..

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2009-05-19T15:04:00.001+08:00

'You'll be facing difficulties in managing some of your relationships with people this week, which you're too drained to try to handle and fix.'

Erm, i think i get that one now.

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2009-05-16T22:59:00.001+08:00

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2009-05-16T22:22:00.003+08:00

Chem spa today! Accomplished quite a few things today, not very academic related though ... oh i did finish normal tutorial -_- mr ng is going at bullet train speed recently la so scary.

- regripped tennis rackets (finally)
- bought perler bead materials ..
and random other things. oh, i started playing mousehunt. seriously, i got into the hunt like half a year ago but i didnt know what was happening at all so i just let it stagnate. Today then i realised it's quite fun so i started playing again omg it's such a waste of time.

enough of this nonsense tomorrow i must not look at mousehunt every 15 minutes.

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2009-05-10T20:59:00.002+08:00

Someone, anyone at all, go to the Chocolate Research Facility with me!! it's at Millenia Walk :DD the place looks amazing, and the chocolates are heavenly (i heard) at really affordable prices.

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2009-05-05T23:01:00.000+08:00

Words cannot describe how much i love this choir.
each and every one of you!
i'm so glad we pulled through together.

<3

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2009-05-04T20:42:00.002+08:00

ER... i think i do smile too much.

Chiki: whole day smile smile
Lee : you look like you're always vey happy
CT's comments: .... cheerful... ...

.. i'm not always very happy ok. it's just that i don't like to impose my own emotions on others! haha eh but smiling is good lor keep young HA HA ok nvm.

i'm slacking my night away cos i need all the energy i can get for tmr.

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2009-05-03T22:22:00.003+08:00

Harper's island is damn freaky : ( i hate the advert the one which goes 'one by one' in this child's voice ahhhhhh :S

hehe it's VIVO WITH TAMILSYN day! paiseh la vera i thought so far away from your house you sure don't want to come! anyway anyway on the way there i met MR YYW on the bus! : DDD he seems to look younger, i have no idea why. it's been half a year since we last went out! anyway some people are leading a productive life huh teaching A math to rich kids : D treat next time!

reached vivo and proceeded to try to spend some money ... but i ended up only getting a necklace and tamilsyn only got hairties and earrings! zzz online shopping ftw still. zara has a great spring/summer collection but none of it seems to be worth the price tag.

ok i need to sleep EARLY. morning prac again..

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2009-04-29T22:22:00.003+08:00

I don't know how much more i can give, how much more i need to put in for everything to come through. i'm getting stressed up for the first time ever (in these 6 years of life as a chorister), and it really tires me. i keep snapping at everyone and i apologise, really. If you want to judge me because of what i do these few days, go ahead. And i can't be bothered, or rather, i don't have excess energy FOR YOU. Whether you think i'm a NICE PERSON or not, i don't really care. i never wanted to please everybody in the first place anyway, and it's sickening that there are people judging my behaviour all the time. i just hope all these madness will be over soon and my life can get back on track.

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2009-04-26T21:12:00.002+08:00

Father, please help us.
Guide us so those who need to wake up may wake up in time.
Lead us with Your light.

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2009-04-22T20:53:00.004+08:00

Some random pics in my phone..

some 64 5th gen ipods :) me jerrold jonyeo
trying to take the aeroplane cloud only la

monday's sunrise at the terraces :)

ohoh yesterday it was B&J's free cone day : D and i went to raffles city branch with shaltos and had a nice chocolate macademia cone yay

ok more on facebook.. lazy.

ystd i cabbed home in a merz-cab.. just happened that it was the first one to pass by la. and as i was paying for the cab fare the driver said he recognised me cos of the area i stay and my uniform (i think). '' i have sent you home before also ah'' haha quite an interesting experience, since i thought he was abit familiar too. but cab so dark really can remember face. . .

hmm ok 13 days to SYF.

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2009-04-19T11:38:00.002+08:00

Yesterday the temperature was 35 degrees holymama : O no wonder i felt like i was evaporating when we had warmups outside the AVT. And today it's 33 degrees. a BIT better. the Wee says that maybe world's end is coming, like in knowing (the movie). anyway it was such a scary movie : ( the little girl is so morbid and everything and when she grew up it was just 10 times worse. hai and so anyway she could predict disasters to mankind and stuff, and the end of the world (everyone else) was 2009. where the sun's rays would engulf the earth or something ok i admit i fast forwarded a lot, because it was draggy. felt quite sad as i saw families huddling together in the face of death. haha but i think if it really happens it'd be in 2100 or beyond as predicted, and i'd have nothing to do with it :) and i don't think anything we do now would accelerate the process by, i don't know, 30-40 years earlier. so we should be raaaaaather safe.

i need something to cool myself down the weather is so horrible :( i miss the start of this year! where like everyone wore jackets to school because it's so chilly.

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2009-04-17T20:07:00.002+08:00

Today the sunset was beaaaaautiful.
the hues were like, just the right shades!
the only problem was, i was trapped on 171 :/
it took me like 1 hour to get home from somerset.
sian anyway i didn't bring the lomo so i cant really take nice pics haha but stillllll.
i was stuck on the bus listening to this really crude conversation between 2 ladies : ( crude not as in the content but as in the language. i attempted to block them out by maxing my ipod volume but after awhile i gave up cos my ears hurt abit T_T

anyway me and xingyi went to concorde to eat korean foooooood :)) i wanted to eat bibimbap but suddenly forgot the name so i had to do like the mixing action to the korean lady seling wth so stupid. and they didn't sell nanmyeon haha nvm i shall make myself tmr.

it's friday again and next week is week 5 time is passing too fast but i want SYF to faster comeeeee

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2009-04-12T21:47:00.002+08:00

On uniqlo

- i queued 15 mins with xingyi just to get in
- the clothes were gooooooooooood.
- basic stuff, colours!
- mid-price range
- there ARE overpriced stuff though
- Salespeople are v welltrained haha

anyway.. i'm v jealous of people who stay in the east now : ( cos tampines 1 is freaking good.

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2009-04-11T19:17:00.002+08:00

have been quite obsessed with making these :DD although i can't be bothered with decorations cos duh, i'm just making them to EAT. still waiting for adel to lend me the mould omg now all my onigiris are shapeless/round beings and she got the bear shaped / heart shaped moulds! and the traditional triangle ones heh. anyway i just cooked another pot of rice ... need to finish the vinegar pack asap. :D

lee qi, YOU BETTER NOT GET CHICKEN POX.

anyway choir today was <3 we celebrated shilbe's bday again with an icecream cakeee :D reverseO ftw.

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2009-04-10T22:46:00.002+08:00

Thanks for making me feel like i owe people all over again.
that all of us are of no worth to the group.
thanks for hinting that the rest of the class thinks the same way as you do.
thanks for making all those assumptions, although you don't understand how our group worked at all.
Thanks for doubting our ability as individuals.
Thanks for making us responsible.
thanks for respecting me.
thanks for trying to do all you can.
thanks, ya.

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2009-04-10T08:41:00.002+08:00

Yesterday was the much anticipated release of The PW Results.
But rather than euphoria and relieve i felt like the atmosphere was more sombre and of marked ambivalence.

There were some expected results.. and of course unexpected ones. but the unexpected ones are really !!! and it brought people to tears. like, people who weren't even the ones themselves. i didn't feel too good myself (and for obvious reasons, as my class would know). although i did get The Grade, i felt like i owed him something, somehow. something i might not be able to repay. i didn't know how to react either, so while jiahui tried to advice/comfort/whatever him, i could only stone by the side. There are a million reasons possibly as to what went wrong in the whole process. sigh !@#!!@!# i don't know if i should apologize, or if WE should, as a matter of fact. the whole thing is just quite screwed up.

for classes who've had full As, please feel blessed. : ( because the results release was really a hell of an emotional rollercoaster ride for the rest of us.

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2009-04-06T21:07:00.001+08:00

WANG ZIJING
ahaha you're not in sch for so long that we've forgotten what it's like to have you around!
ok just kidding.. but you better come back soon LOOOOOOOOOOOL

lee qi came back today HAHAH i'm so nice to say you look slimmer right :))

ok don't feel like blogging anymore.

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2009-03-29T09:41:00.000+08:00

i cannnot, absolutely cannot stand guys who appear weak or make themselves look weak.

- vera

^5!

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2009-03-26T21:26:00.003+08:00

Things which made me happy today.

1) struggled with and completed the 2nd complex tut like finally. i swear, we have a love-hate relationship.
2) had a very nice bowl of dry korean instant noodles :D! i think i'd switch to korean instead of jap mee. cos they're like, half the price only, and taste even better.
3) tmr is friday!
4) i saw a teddy bear shaped cloud.
5) Finally got my new water bottle so i can stop drinking from everyone's bottles :DDDD
6) i made a VERY NICE mirror during chem lab today.
7) eh.. can't think of anything else at the moment but it was quite a good day yo

but then ... with lessons in full swings again and me having to catch up with all the things i've ignored before blocks (i.e. carbonyl compounds, unemployment and inflation, electromagnetism and electric fields, and COMPLEX FREAKING NUMBERS), im quite screwed.

and although tmr is friday... it'll be a long and arduous day before i can get home. i suspect 9 is a nice prediction. T.T

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2009-03-25T00:33:00.001+08:00

haha the 'class outing today' :/ no girls wanted to go la damn bleh. so i went town with yitinggg :D spotlight-ed and sushi tei-ed! yummmmmm

tmr is mega slackorz day haha it's THE wednesday.

the day to take a breather before it all starts again.

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2009-03-23T22:34:00.002+08:00

i pray that tonight i can sleep well T_T
i think for the past week my sleeping times are kind of messed up so ystd i laid (lied?) down at 10pm and.. fell asleep at 12.
which is kind of sad cos i was scrolling through my 4000 + songs.
ok not that many .. but i went through at least 1000 i bet. skipping all the emo and noisy glen songs (hahah hope he doesn't see this).

and tmr morning ... dad is leaving the country at 8 so he's prolly waking up at 6 and zomg i bet i'll wake up too : (((((( and have a horrible morning to spend away while waiting for doomsday at 1pm. before which i will meet ppl in sch for lunch ... and countdown together to the end of everything. or maybe the start, whichever.

on a sidenote... i'm home alone until sunday again. which means ... PPL, LET'S GO OUT WAHAHAH :DDDDDD

and on a less positive note ... i can't believe i didn't realise the lights were numbered. f!!! and the teachers, who cares what schools they are allocated to and if each school gets at least 1 teacher? i'm sure there's enough teachers to go around..................................... !@(!(#)*!#%

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2009-03-23T17:45:00.003+08:00

just passed by the facebook profile of someone i used to think was DAMN good looking.
haha... speechless..
i was wrong ok. :)

long hair is NO. NOOOO.

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2009-03-22T20:41:00.004+08:00

zomg. i knew that J2 was going to be fast, but i didn't know exactly how fast.
i think i do now.
like.. it's 22nd March now. and by next sunday it'd be 29th.
and April.. and before we know it it'd be may.. and june and july and fast forward and it'll be the As. which makes me :S

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2009-03-20T21:09:00.002+08:00

i think my day was wasted away : (
this morning i did practically nothing..
but i did (finally) get to watch slumdog millionaire. on dvd :DDDD
hur, it's utter brilliance.
do watch it if you haven't..

then after that i went to school to attempt to study with xingyi, jiamin and adel .... but we all felt quite unproductive i wonder why. i think it's the TGIF mood..

after the exams i want to watch
1) Departures
2) Confessions of a shopaholic :DDD
3) and... finish my Voice.

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2009-03-16T17:21:00.002+08:00

today's one of the days when
i feel like nothing is in my control.
relationship with others, cca, ionic equilibria, and everything else.

and you thought this was bad?
tmr will be so much worse.

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2009-03-15T23:37:00.001+08:00

watching the lives of others on okto!
and i have 2 revelations ..

1) i miss history. studying it and hell ya even the memorising bits. like crazy.

2) i want to buy a typewriter.

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2009-03-15T09:33:00.003+08:00

Just choked on water. and i cried. >:/

whatever. going for NUS open house later with shaltos :D

[edit:3.31pm] wth. the road infront of my estate is flooded!!!!! had to cab back from west mall after the open house >:/ quite scary the driving cos can't even see the road infront of the cab omg. anyway..

Dear students,
Most of you may have forgotten the wiki website:
http://hcimathdept.pbwiki.com

Do add this link to your favourite.

Mr Ng TC

hurhur...

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2009-03-14T23:02:00.002+08:00

slowly picking up my organic chem and integration again T_T
it feels like i'm starting from scratch luh, sucks.

i prolly shouldn't bring any cash >50 bucks out next time. just blew 45 imme. :// and i had to take the train then change bus home. went past school .. wonder if anyone went for talentime today >:O paiseh la i pangseh, ponyo :) i wanted to see chiakai and co though.

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2009-03-13T20:22:00.007+08:00

My phone's memory card just told me it's full -.- so i've transferred everything to the comp .. quite funny looking at all the photos (note: from JUMPSTART last year. zomg). and .. some people i don't even talk to anymore. some others whom i've grown closer since then .. photos from my HK Graz vienna and beijing trips.. etc etc.

i think unknowingly my phone's camera was on macro for around 2 months or so. i swear i didn't know. anyway.. that was from the rainbow day. quite sad cos the macro screwed it up :( hee
i think we both rarely wear these nowadays.

still got alot more haha my internet kind of sucks now so maybe another day.

i don't want tonight to be over :O

have been home alone from weds.. dad's coming home on mon. please date me out to eat ppl, i've been surviving on crap. literally. today i ate out with yitingggg :) at the taiwanese snacks place at Bukit timah plaza. serving v small :( then after that we went to the dancestudio cum cafe place and drank nice milkshakes :DD and the hiphop dance instructor is cute hee hee.

shucks omg i just tried to log into my LJ with my NRIC. IT'S NOT SMB/ISP OMG what am i doing.

[edit//] OH anyway, just now we saw C and her boyfriend(?) too. shopping at BTP? weird dating location.. haha suddenly everyone's getting attached....

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2009-03-13T12:17:00.002+08:00

just done with physics.. i feel horrible. think i underestimated many questions, and oversimplified the situation a lot of times. my explanations were prolly terrible too. besides, the MCQ was such a killer.

beyond disappointing .... 3 down, 2 to go.

ystd as i was thinking about my GP essay i think i might have been completely off tangent. maybe i wasn't even supposed to question the assumption in the question at all.

whatever, i'll just go drown myself in emo songs for the rest of the day. TGIF. and.. 1 week to chem and math so i think i'm going to rot for today.

－

2009-03-12T17:36:00.002+08:00

1.UNSPEAKABLE
EVERY LITTLE THING
当たり前だった　
君とふたりそばに居る
鈍くなってゆく　想いが怖くて　
知らぬフリをして

淋しいかもわからずに
いつの間にか空白の
時間だけが　ただ過ぎていった

出逢えた喜びを　愛してゆく意味を
あふれる優しさで　伝えて欲しい
サヨナラも言えないくらいに
しっかり　抱き締めていてね
言葉じゃ足りない　想いだけが
心をつなぎとめる
「昔は、ヨカッタ」茶化すように言うけれど
締め付けられてく想いが痛くて泣き笑いになる

淋しさから逃げたくって
離れるコト考えた
あと一歩が　踏み出せなかった
「ずっと一緒だよ」と　揃いで買った指環
あの頃と変わらず輝いてた
こんなにも近くに居るなら　
この手を離さずにいてね
言葉じゃ届かない想いがある
大事な想いがある

出逢えた喜びを　愛してゆく意味を
あふれる優しさで　伝えて欲しい
サヨナラも言えないくらいに
しっかり抱き締めていてね
言葉じゃ足りない　想いだけが
心をつなぎとめる

大事な想いがある

-

2009-03-11T13:51:00.003+08:00

Gp was, bah, let's not talk about it.

Some things this few days which made me ponder...

'If she is fatigued, she never betrays it. An eager, insistent clot of people pushes toward her, and somehow she manages to greet each well-wisher with a fractional recalibration of body language that suggests a wordless surge of elated surprise on her part: Oh, it's you! You're the one I've been most hoping to see, and how wonderful that we share that secret knowledge!' - Time on Kate Winslet

Was just thinking about this. i think i may never be able to achieve that. blah, please tell me if you feel underappreciated.

and i should totally go study for econs. the dreadful ... BPP starbucks! AFTER zijing wakes up from her nap HAHA

-

2009-03-07T23:17:00.003+08:00

'La Maison en Petits Cubes' the Japanese animation which won at the Academy awards this year.
go youtube it! it's only ~12 mins long.
i knew that it'd be touching .. but i ended up like, crying my eyes out.

ok jk .. but it's really v touching.
love, simplicity, solitude, sorrow, longing..
v nice music and cinematography.
boo to immature comments which said it's boring! :(

-

2009-03-06T15:34:00.002+08:00

Alevel results release today!
God, i'm feeling the heat.
as i squeezed outside the hall listening to the results, i think i feel damn nervous also omg.
i think hc did ok ... and of course outstanding ones are still outstanding :DD like rui an and stanley.

talked to shaw for awhile at the canteen and saw many ppl walk past. some looked emotionless, some looked flustered and some were literally in tears. i don't know if it's tears of joy or sorrow but i do wish it's the former :S

ah omg must really buck up now.

-

2009-03-05T18:04:00.002+08:00

i don't know if i want to know but omg it's killing me!!

soon.

(edit: now that i'm reading this, it makes zilch sense)

-

2009-03-04T16:16:00.002+08:00

wanted to go cut hair today.. then i realised that cindy's off on weds!

just now .. it was like damn sunny and hot.and suddenly there was a downpour T_T and it lasted for 5 mins only which was precisely the time i take from the bus stop to my house! and my bag was drenched so now it's like sunning on the balcony. ._.

anyway.. do i look dao or appear to want to dao ppl on the bus? blame zijing please .. her training haha! :DD just to clarify, i don't mean to not say hi, just that if you are 1) asleep 2) listening to music 3) stoning 4) talking to another friend, i may not force a hello from you. that said .. ZIJING, you look like if someone says hi to you you'll box the person. i'm serious. HAHAH

ok better go do something productive..

-

2009-03-01T09:32:00.003+08:00

partial 64

partial 64 girls
64

the jeremy ang II

STJ last night! .. at first it started out quite boring i think some ppl lost mood cos of the change in venue but in the end i guess it turned out fine la. took bus home with the bukit panjang gang which was quite fun HAHA. i felt quite guilty cos .. i think only my present for my angel was nice. my mortal (very timingly) gave me a photo album do you hear that dearies :DDDDD time to finish my 2nd roll of film .. and i only gave him sweets cos we only wrote to each other once. and ... i had no idea i had a 2nd angel cos his letter got thrown away with our letter box T_T but he still gave me a soft toy then i never give him anything nooooooooooooo. got more chocolates .. i don't think i can ever finish .. haven't even eaten yu jay's from last year!!

i got flu AGAIN. i think ystd was too cold.

anyway i'm quite addicted to this song after under pressure! do ya have to, do ya have to let it linger.. you know i'm such a fool for you .. gets stuck in my head la T_T maybe also cos yichan used to sing. oh well anyway it's quite nice so it's on my playlist now .. it can take my mind off mambo at least. after choir everytime it's like the replay button is hit and i just can't stop thinking about the rhythm of the song. zzzzzzzz

-

2009-02-27T21:41:00.004+08:00

hello hello today's friday night and i don't feel like doing anything productive!
happy today cos my angel gave me a cute something attached to his postcard!

haha he doesn't know that i know who he is yet i think. tmr will be the day i reveal it XD my mortals are quite fei, only 1 replied me twice, thanks, i think i'll give you something nice to eat tmr. the other one .... can just go eat yourself! haha just kidding la.

feel lethaaaaaaargic but happy talking to ppl online! and bloghopping.

and and and did i mention, i saw a super nice and full rainbow on weds when adel xingyi and i were walking out of school!!! we just practically screamed and stopped to take pics : D but my phone's camera cmi cannot capture the full beauty of it la.

AND today when i was walking home i saw the most beautiful sunset! it was red, orange, with dashes of purple and ... dark matter. heeee

quite high ok tmr is busybusy! choir workshop (hope we don't screw up), movie with chenx and STJ at night.

[edit/]changed movie date to sun : D

-

2009-02-26T17:05:00.003+08:00

Have been busy busy this few days, although i don't know exactly what for. but i'm feeling v busy :/ and today was a horrible day! had both math test (50 mins omg) and chem SPA! at least they're both over let's not talk about them ...

school feels increasingly boring everyday!
there's ppl who make me dread school.
but also ppl who make me look forward to school alot! like my dearies and shaltos and many more!

blocks in a week's time T_T

and and ... choir is ._. just want to encourage the J1s now if any one happen to pass by .. and pls don't quit. =.=

got some stuff i want to blog about but it's in my LJ .. interested parties can go read. ahma, i think this is a great idea! : D

-

2009-02-24T22:26:00.003+08:00

power of emb .. i finally realised how many people randomly read messages not related to them at all?!

anyway. THAT i'm on the CUHK visitor list does not denote with a fullstop that i will be going to HK for U. just keeping my options open, la. and HK is cheap compared to US/UK .. in light of the ongoing recession .. yada yada ... ranks are good too ... i kind of don't want a replica of hwachong ppl for my university life? but God knows that will happen.

this weekend is STJ -.- blasts 40 bucks away again :/ haven't got the gifts yet damned.

anyway this year is the first exam in my entire life that i feel so freaking unsure of everything. even for SPA. chem spa is ???and my two graphs didn't even coincide for G2, i just manipulated the results. then today zijing was like 'then your own problem la'. thanks .. stressed for SPA! and blocks is woohoo near, i can smell my failed econs script infront of me. it's next next thurs btw. then physics. oh. em. GGG.

wuahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

-

2009-02-22T18:39:00.000+08:00

YOU PEST!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

-

2009-02-13T21:37:00.004+08:00

Best birthday ever! Not quite in the studying mood today heehee.

Thanks to everyone who wished/gave presents! Chie, Salty, xianyou, xinyi, borui, zhiwei, jean, cherie, seok, marianne, jonyeo, cheeshan, howard, zijing, yiting, yitty, tianyu, vera, shixuan, sidney, Jessie (sorry so much i think i pissed you off by asking you who you were :( ), Yew wai (though i don't think you will see), lishian, chiaern, tamilsyn, michael, denyse, elizabeth, ZOEEE, shien, sinyee, meisi and my classmates :D sorry those i never list name! and my dearest shaltos!! adel mel yichan huiwei jiamin xingyi and shibeeeeeeeee!! i'm putting the card in my frame.

You guys mean the world to me. (:

Just came back from traders hotel buffet dinner with family ... it was SO GOOD. those who like the school's panna cotta must go eat some real panna cotta. and the lobster! yum. haha ate so much i wanted to go back to campfire to hang around. Then got scammed by adel say they all san4 already :/ so i didn't go back. but in the end never san4!

ok feeling v tired now ... shall go off : D

i'm legal!

-

2009-02-12T17:09:00.002+08:00

just a short post ... Anyone interested in going for the japan study fair posted on smb today? i don't know if i should go leh. i'm not AS intent on going to Japan as last year already, but a part of me still lingers on that thought i guess. But then there's language and stuff ... barriers ... high SOL ... even if i meng mug for half a year can jap be used to study uni-level stuff? etc etc but if i go to the fair and talk to some of the alumni i may be clearer right? caught in a quandary..

if let's say i make it to todai, meji or waseda ... that's like top of the tops and on comparable level / >sg Us ... sort of doubtful about going to US now.

anyway that's besides the point... ANYONE WANT TO GO? sms/msn/tell me. :))

going to watch under pressure with shaltos later :D

-

2009-02-10T15:45:00.002+08:00

-

2009-02-08T19:04:00.003+08:00

Went for LCIP at sembawang yesterday morning, which wasn't half as bad as what i expected :))))) so many people were missing anyway. and we really had fun painting HAHAH in our little corner and the paint made us waaaay high

then at night went to haji lane for combined bday celebration! :DD pics later. the arab place was damn fun HAHA my jeans reeked of it so i had to hang it out to air today though :// but the bloody mary was so gross that we had to play game so that the loser could finish it. i think Gin tonic should be the safest ..

thanks yiting for the pencilcase! :DD there's a small dent on it though i think made by the skull pen inside :((((

anyway i must advertise this. http://thephotographicdictionary.org/! spent like 20 mins just browsing. nice stuff.

- kinetic

hate singnet's connection btw :/ haven't been able to access smb and isp and even hc.edu.sg since like friday thanks.

-

2009-02-06T19:25:00.002+08:00

Some people are born to be in the limelight
or they simply can't wait to squeeze their way into it
But sadly, i'm not one of them.
so the past week have been quite zz.
whenever i see yearbooks lying around i have an instant urge to
throw them all into the nearest dustbin! ! !

ok enough whining hope all the leftover copies are in the dustbin on monday.

which reminds me ... i didn't take any back. oooooops. not that it matters HOHO

tmr night will be funfunfun! just hope to get through the day ASAP.

-

2009-02-03T23:06:00.002+08:00

In one weekend, two of my friends got cheated buying polaroids.
so annoying!
i guess everyone has their own reasons for selling used things off.
but lying / exaggerating about their commodities is like, super underhand!
:/

-

2009-01-30T20:40:00.004+08:00

HELLO ALL
the past two days ..super tiring.
can...hardly....pay...much atten..tion in classes, especially lectures.
thanks to hangovers, late night talks and other things in the name of CNY.
sunday was the worst .. can't rmb how many cups of fruit wine/red wine went down.
but tmr is ssssssaturday again! thank God (:

i know i've wished already, but

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WANG ZIJING

i'm so glad we're in the same class (: <33333s

and .. thank You Lord for everything else.

-

2009-01-25T11:45:00.001+08:00

i know i'm abit lag but ..
just watched the Obama inauguration speech!
on youtube la, duh.
and it's HOT STUFF : DDDD

-

2009-01-23T20:29:00.002+08:00

i've never agreed much with your way of life.
(in fact, i've always wondered where it can lead you ultimately)
but that doesn't mean i have to criticise it infront of you, or mock you about it.
so can you also show me the same kind of respect?
kthxbye.

-

2009-01-19T20:04:00.002+08:00

Why is it i'm feeling more and more like someone i would detest?

i complain about the slightest of things
i'm making enemies more easily than ever
i can't seem to take things with a pinch of salt
i can't stop myself from gasping out loud about something i don't agree with

i've always liked to take a step back for a clearer perspective. and this time i can't say i like that perspective at all. It kind of sucks but i want to go back to who i was before. This identity crisis thing is lame and retarded, but i can't help but think about it sometimes.

just last week a friend was telling me how he felt like he grew up to be a worse person than before. not the exact words but that was the idea. Now i sort of get it.

On a side note, i felt extremely insecure for a moment when i realised i left my cross necklace in Adel's bag when i took it off for a choir performance. Seems like i need Him more than ever now.

-

2009-01-18T21:19:00.005+08:00

Been one week into school, and i'm missing my hair : (

btw, mum scolded me for dyeing it black. walaossssss.

nvm .. the next time i dye it BACK to a colour i like (end of year) i won't ever have to dye it black again.

anyway.. this week has been so boring!

but the wind very nice : DDDD

been searching for something i'd like to major in ... and realised it's quite hard to decide.

should it be interest > job prospect or the reverse ... availability of financial aid ... what city is it in .. ranking .. stuff like that.

must thank my senior meisi for helping me out abit :D

tmr i need to reach school at like 6.30 and be changed into gown by 6.40. so retardedly early ... :( then after that need to rush back for GP and then later still got math test! wtshit ... i suck at APGP ...

oh anyway i had quite a slack weekend. kept playing with miotv and watched the new korean version of meteor garden. quite fei4 la. let me search for a pic ...

anyway, you get the idea .. this kind of guys la. -_- quite lame but funny and can pass time watching HAHA.

-

2009-01-16T23:26:00.001+08:00

ignorance is bliss!

-

2009-01-10T23:06:00.002+08:00

lalala
first post of 2009!
not going to waste my time writing resolutions anymore, cos i just take the year as it comes anyway.

last day of holiday tmr and it's going to be a horrible zibi day cos ..
vickytor gan mentioned that the new GP teacher is damn strict
so we all have to do GP homework and hand in
first day, first lesson
._.
and my econs homework, which currently is maybe 20% done.
and physics, all those blanks! apparently need to hand in (THANKS ZIYUAN -_-)

oh but on the whole i'm rather pleased with the new time table :)
i end at 1 on tues, and 1.30 on friday!!!!!!!!!
with the exception of horrible monday which i end at 3, the rest of the days i end before 2 or at 2.
i wave a tearful goodbye to PW..
and our class is not split up for GP! yayyy
but i don't have 2 hour breaks anymore. good and bad ..

currently fretting over SATs :S
apparently i need to take at least 2 or 3 SAT IIs too in the course of this one year. and maybe i also need to retake SAT I.

suddenly i don't feel like blogging anymore so this shall wait.
happy school reopening guys :D

-

2008-12-30T19:24:00.003+08:00

One day to new year countdown... zomg!
Hope everyone's having (and had) fun during the holidays :D
i think these 3 weeks have been wasted away for me T_T
i'm looking forward to 2009 yet fearing it.
Back to singapore this sat!

-

2008-12-15T18:08:00.003+08:00

HELLO WORLD!
i'm in beijing now and it's
super freezing cold T_T
but the net is mega fast! 100Mbps
which reminds me sadly, the singnet plan i signed up for is..
8Mbps? i hope it's not snail speed :( cos i'm really starting to get used to this here :DD

btw, ADELINE YOU AHMA, your blog appears to be blocked here. HAHAHAH what on earth did you write . .

-

2008-12-12T12:28:00.000+08:00

my wireless is dead : ( just signed up for the singtel package which can only be installed in jan wtf.. at BK now watching gossip girlllllll : )

see you darlings!

-

2008-12-09T23:36:00.002+08:00

For a moment i was getting pissed off ..
and like,
wtf, life isn't fair!
if i were in _____ , or as a matter of fact if WE were in _____ we'd have had another shot possibly.
but then i guess i learn to count my blessings.

As in, come to think of it seriously,
there really isn't anything this year that i really wanted
but couldn't get.
And for this .. do i really want it?
half a year down the road i may change my decision totally
i might be cursing myself for even remotely having the desire to get it.

aiya. what am i thinking?
just let Him lead the way.

-

2008-11-30T22:42:00.002+08:00

Maria commented that my posts are all short!
which is true..
so today i shall attempt to
make them look longer!

So we went to the airport to send shanghai OCIP people off today!
and me and jonyeo managed to..
freeride swensen's with marianne's mom!
yay ^^
then we packed the rice for sidney.
blah, the rice was like, all tasteless at the bottom hee hee.

Like jonyeo said
everytime we go to the airport to send people off
we also will feel like going overseas ourselves!
meeeeeep
T3's not that nice.. too much space and light!

Saturday's workshop went finer than i'd imagined!
so there's no more choir for until i leave on the 14th!
hm ... what to do for this 2 weeks ..

ok things i really need to do..
1) chem holiday assignment which i abandoned.
2) Ideas and issues wtf.
3) Finish the world is flat
4) Get my moleskine 2009 weekly planner/notebook thingo. i hope the red's still available!
5) the muji cap omg.
6) oxfords?
7) Moccasins from oldnavy!

noooo this is not going to turn into a shopping list. gah!

Oh! happy happy cos i bought nice flats from muji sat after workshop! and today i finally got a hardisk so now all my videos/music/docs are in it and i cleared my laptop. it seems faster now!

ok i think this is long enough an entry. xoxo

=

2008-11-22T17:38:00.001+08:00

right. so my friend just got 3 solid 800s for her SAT IIs. (chem, maths 2 and physics).

note to self: omg, stop slacking already!

-

2008-11-18T14:11:00.000+08:00

I'M BACK!!!!
FEELS DAMN GOOD TO BE HERE, NUFF SAID.

-

2008-11-07T23:35:00.002+08:00

Leaving for vietnam on sunday ... not prepared mentally/physically/whatever-lly ! just finished packing in less than an hour's time so that's quite a feat. i have to like wear berms over there zomg which is some fashion i haven't touched since primary school.

lala ... BYEBYE PW.

oh .. steamboat just now was fun : )

-

2008-11-05T10:52:00.001+08:00

Something i dreaded for a long long time is about to materialise!

Dear God,

i pray that this is good.

Amen

-

2008-10-30T22:55:00.003+08:00

Sometimes i wish i can be a blind follower too.

heehee!

just a piece of advice for you btw..

Find out where you stand before you find yourself stood up.

-

2008-10-30T00:15:00.002+08:00

Choir is getting increasingly tiring .. i think we've all gotten used to singing in a 'good' choir so as to speak, so some people began to take that for granted. Then when there's setbacks (like now) the morale goes down like mad. But cheers people, there's got to be more to life than er mucking around feeling sore about stuff. I'm sure we'll get there soon.

-

2008-10-26T19:47:00.002+08:00

SCREAM! was alot of fun ystd : D though i didn't go for the trail / the maze (Blah to the shifted back timings .. needed to be home by 11 :( ) but we scared the shit out of ourselves by watching the eye and shutter. Er and with shilbe darling sitting behind me i think my hearing's half gone too. Wasn't even scary! but people were screaming at every single part HAHA it was hilarious, like the part where there was this old man in the lift. who didn't exist in the CCTV beside the lift. and then i had to also take lift by myself when i went home : ( so i was thinking about the old man while i was in the lift. Thank God i live on the 7th floor.

Happy deepavali folks! tmr shall be a wunderful day, and i shall wake up LATE.

xoxo

-

2008-10-23T15:31:00.002+08:00

Got bitten by a mad dog just now.
lucky the person wasn't my friend to begin with XD if not it'd get kind of irritating.
oh well, had fun ignoring her!

-

2008-10-21T20:47:00.003+08:00

Tmr ... there won't be any A2s for 1 and a half hours.
Too bad i meant, that's such a tragedy. Lack of 5 important BIMBOS.

i think my head'll roll with the above text posted.

lalala. so, overall ... if you're interested, my grades are neither here nor there! BBBBC (thanks hor GP the kanasai C). I can't tell whether ABBBD or BBBBC is better. Actually, i prefer the former. but i guess it's all good. My God Shines! maybe just a bit disappointed i missed so slightly A for chem and math for overalls.

P.S.. PW IS THE ULTIMATE ABCDEFGHIJK BEST SUBJECT ON EARTH I WISH IT'LL CONTINUE EVER AND EVER FOR DECADES AND MILLENIUMS TO COME. ON AND ON!

-

2008-10-12T17:00:00.002+08:00

finally finished the OCIP BLOG ! been so long since i started a blogskin from scratch .. tiring, but very fulfilling :D who cares if no one blogs there, it'll be added to my design portfolio anyways. one thing down!

anyway.. pics from friday! and miscellaneous

-

2008-10-09T22:29:00.002+08:00

i don't know why, but life sucks right now! i feel busier than ever, and that post-promos is horrible. except for the fact that i can cast all notes aside, i don't seem to be enjoying one bit. i don't know what shiz i've gotten myself into, and all the work just keeps piling up. everyday i go to school wanting to sleep, facing all these expectations from choir OCIP PW and blahblah whatnots.

i just wish school can faster end wtf.

-

2008-10-06T19:04:00.003+08:00

i must say ... it feels good to be free!
oh well, at least until after 2 days later. when the PW horror starts T_T
been catching up with ppl .. going out ((:

HAPPY BDAY MELISSA GOHHHHHHH !

archery tmr. so exciting!

実に面白い。

NVM, private joke..

-

2008-10-05T21:35:00.002+08:00

find it very sian that ....
before exams, my life belong to others
during exams, my life belong to books
after exams, my life seems to belong to others again.

interesting..

-

2008-09-23T09:27:00.000+08:00

i have come to the conclusion that relationships are fragile.

that's all.

2008-09-17T21:13:00.002+08:00

watched this 2002 takeshi kitano film yesterday night. alone. near midnight. blah i do regret it :( not because it was a horror film, it so isn't. 3 stories of unrequited love. so depressing luh :/

約束だよ？

-

2008-09-13T22:46:00.003+08:00

Ｓｕｐｅｒｆｌｙ　－　愛をこめて花束を

二人で写真を撮ろう懐かしいこの景色と
あの日と同じポーズでおどけてみせて欲しい

見上げる空の青さを気まぐれに雲は流れ
キレイなものは遠くにあるからキレイなの

約束したとおりあなたと
ここに来られて本当に良かったわ
この込み上がる気持ちが愛じゃないなら
何が愛かわからないほど

愛をこめて花束を大袈裟だけど受け取って
理由なんて訊かないでよね
今だけすべて忘れて笑わないで受けとめて
照れていないで

昨日とよく似た今日は何気ない分かれ道を
分かって選びそびれた臆病のせいでしょう

私は泣くのが得意で
最初から慰めを当てにしてたわ
何度も間違った道選び続けて
正しくここに戻って来たの

巡り巡る時を超えいつもあなたの所へと
この心舞い戻ってゆく
無理に描く理想より笑い合える今日の方が
ずっと幸せね

violet, indigo, black and blue
flame, yellow, purple, sky blue,
pink, yellow green, ash, brown……
あなたに贈る色は……?

巡り巡る時を超えいつもあなたの所へと
この心舞い戻ってゆく
ありがとうも言い出せずに甘えていた
今日ここへ来るまでは

愛をこめて花束を大袈裟だけど受け取って
理由なんて訊かないでね
今だけすべて忘れて笑わないで受けとめて
本当のわたしを

いつまでもそばにいて

-

2008-09-11T23:14:00.002+08:00

Let go, let God!

Exactly what i need to tell myself more everyday. i'm failing to see His bigger plan.